In today’s digital world, building online trust between parents and children is a critical aspect of parenting. Trust is formed through open communication about activities on the internet, fostering an environment in which children feel comfortable confiding in their parents. One sided rules risk the opposite. By involving your children in decisions about using tools such as location services, you empower them to make thoughtful, informed choices online. This creates a partnership, and sets the stage for stronger relationships both online and offline through collaboration, reducing the likelihood of secretive or unsafe online behavior.
A Communication Partnership
- Establish open lines of communication.
- Children need to know that they can come to their parents and caregivers to discuss any and all topics.
- As parents, we often only know a limited amount about what our children are carrying and trying to manage.
- Letting your children know that you are open to discuss all topics can be a huge step in building a partnership for positive decision making.
- Be transparent about what you are doing to monitor their app/internet use and explain why you are monitoring it.
- Nothing makes children shut down faster than thinking that their parents are being dishonest with them.
- By being open about monitoring, you can show children that you’re not out to get them, but rather you care about their online well-being.
- Set agreements ahead of time and discuss consequences for not adhering to those agreements.
- Setting agreements together helps build consensus about limits that are seen as reasonable.
- It’s easier to handle situations if everyone agrees on specific limits and consequences upfront.
- You can set positive consequences or expand access when children adhere to your agreed upon limits.
Setting Limits and Building Trust
Parents should work with their children to set clear internet guidelines, ensuring a safer and more supportive online experience.
- Use the tools at your disposal.
- iPhone users can set up app limits and view apps that their children are using in the Family Sharing/Screen Time settings.
- Android Users can use the Google Family Link app to monitor their children’s app use.
- Explore the pros and cons of location services – sharing location can offer parents peace of mind. However, it is important to discuss whether or not your children should share their location with people outside of your family.
- Ask questions
- Many parents aren’t sure how their children are using specific apps. Have a conversation with your children to decide which apps are appropriate and how much screen time is healthy.
- Be aware that one-sided rules may lead to resistance and more secretive behaviors.
- Consider that over-monitoring can damage trust and make children feel controlled.
Leading by Example
Parents should set a good example for their children. By modeling responsible online behavior like verifying sources, protecting privacy, and using technology mindfully, parents encourage their children to do the same.
- Verifying sources – by doubling checking the accuracy of online sources, parents can model positive digital literacy skills for their children.
- Protecting privacy – parents should engage in conversations with their children about how they protect their own personal data and the data of others online.
- Using technology mindfully – take advantage of screen time tools to monitor your own online activity.
By fostering open communication, setting clear boundaries, and leading by example, parents can build a foundation of trust with their children in the digital age. This collaborative approach empowers children to make informed decisions, promotes responsible online behavior, and strengthens family bonds.
